Poem 20: Heartbreak 5

How come these heartbreaks are never ending? How come these heartbreaks only get worse and worse by the minute? It wasn’t with you this time... it was him. He, him as in yes i finally gave up on you because we clearly weren’t compatible enough to work our way through. 
Have you moved on?” You whispered, almost as if you didnt want to hear the answer.   And i paused, but only for a short moment.   “I….I’m not sure. Its changed, everything’s changed. Its been 9 months now. I dont think of you every time I see the ocean, or think about how freaking cold you must be all the time.” I laughed. “But… it’s when I’m lonely, or need something to think about. I automatically go to you. Over that past year, I think I trained myself to do this. But I cant, not anymore. Its not fair.”  “What’s not fair?”  “Everything. Us. The fact that whenever I think of someone to fall back on, it’s you, and you’re not there .“ although given up on you, you still seem to be my go to ... my escape and I’m not sure why but maybe it was meant to be this way... maybe I’m meant to be with a heartbreak .